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Blood Sisters: So Far, So Mo

by Rachel Adepeju Onamusi June 7, 2022
by Rachel Adepeju Onamusi June 7, 2022

SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen this and still plan to, scroll on by.

Right. Have they all left? Excellent. Coven is in session.

Firstly, I can only assume that after Ms. Mo Abudu, the producer of Netflix Original Series, Blood Sisters, watched King of Boys, she popped her head out of her office and screamed, “Kafayaaaaaah! You’re fired!! Why? Why?! Because I want to, that’s why!”

After which, she brought her writing team together, thoroughly berated them for not having thought of the KOB script first, fired more people and then charged them to produce her own killer series post-haste.

As with a lot of what I have come to expect from Ebonylife Productions, there’s more silk than substance, more effizy than effort, more glamour than glorious story telling. Lazy storytelling that is a series of pastiches held together by magnificent cinematography.

Let’s see:

A movie broken down into episodes
Ending on a cliffhanger.

A matriarch with ruthless ambition who killed her husband to get where she is.

Emphasis on the clothes with a hundred panoramic shots of costumes that are supposed to be regal.

Highly dysfunctional children…who end up killing themselves.

A loyal fixer.

An ambitious daughter-in-law with more balls than the bolo of a son.

An incorruptible detective determined to follow the truth as opposed to the money.

So far, so King of Boys. Except it simply falls short at every turn. Far inferior to Ms. Kemi Adetiba’s glorious offering.

But I mentioned pastiches earlier, right? So, what other imitations exist?

A shady ex-boyfriend who’s always useful for a gun? Every action feem ever liveth.

Aforementioned shady ex sitting in a darkened room with a girl counting money (drugs?) in nothing but her underwear? Lol, every mafia movie ever.

Car dies in a most unfortunate spot? Hollywood 101.

Just when they couldn’t go further, a ‘helpful’ couple appear to help? Hello, Queen & Slim, fancy seeing you here?
Now, for the plot holes. I’ll be brief; this is already longer than the film!

I don’t know why Kate Henshaw would allow herself to be directed like that. Her role was unbelievable and lacked layers. One must feel something for the character: Grudging respect, loathing or empathy. I felt nothing other than a mild “Wetin dey worry this woman sef? Abeg straight your face jo!” and don’t get me started on the makeup or the excessively fussy and flouncy wardrobe. No.

Why was everyone saying Ramsay Noah tried? Fixer or Uber? Just driving upandan for no conceivable reason. What kind of fixer gets bested by two scared amateur girls over and over again? And as for that shot with his remaining edges plastered over his dome as he escapes the Makoko river, the less said about that, the better.

I really liked the two girls’ acting. But you are on the run, being hunted by a connected and savage matriarch for the execution of her beloved son. You saw a random couple and not only did you get into their car, you followed him home, and agreed to spend the night? How is this plausible? Even girls who are not on the run from anyone don’t take this risk. You no dey fear money ritual? Ashewo sef are no longer about this life. Where they do that at? Because it ain’t Nigeria!

Femi’s wife played her part to perfection except for one small flaw (and this is subjective, please): Most ladies who have to constantly cajole, coax and prod their man to greatness (usually because she might be smarter but he’s the heir) rarely hold deep wells of passion and lust for their Simpleton. Yes, you lay the p*say on him if needs must, but usually, they are not having this level of gratuitous s3x with their husband. But perhaps Ms. Abudu felt this was the only thing missing in KOB so she said mek she spice am.

We are to believe that Timeyin is inherently good, just damaged by childhood trauma. Except the first chance she gets to free herself of her mother’s suffocating vice-like grip, she shoots…her brother and his wife instead?
Kola’s character was not at all well developed. I’ll just leave it at that.
I was on the third episode when I was like if this MTN reseller posing as an assassin had only done his job, I wouldn’t have to sit through this o. Because I don’t know why this one came to a wedding in a yellow t-shirt and squeezing face like who smelled hot mess now.

All of this is unfortunate because the premise is stellar. Not original because, like I said before: Queen & Slim, but it could have been really something.

But.
So far, so Mo.

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Rachel Adepeju Onamusi

Onamusi is a Marketing & Digital Media strategist

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